First, watch the following video:

Next month, Toronto will host it’s annual film festival: TIFF : Toronto International Film Festival.  Earlier this week, a patron of the venue that will be screening the films, Scotiabank Theatre; complained about red spots and an itchy sensation. Oh frak. Bed bugs.  TIFF officials responded by tweeting that they were in contact with Cineplex, the company that manages the theatre, to make sure the film festival would be bug free.  Days later, Cineplex declared that not a single bed bug was found in the theatre.  It was a close call, but for some, it was too close for comfort; considering how the cases of bedbugs in Canada and the United States have increased dramatically over the past several years.  Ohio, has been the hardest place hit, with all four major cities (Columbus, Cleveland, Dayton and Cincinnati) reporting high amounts of bed bugs — no word on whether Brutus has been infested yet. 

After a few evenings with Brian Williams, I managed to pick up a few tips; on how to keep your environment, a bed bug free zone.

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A few months ago, video surfaced on the Internet, of a toddler who smokes two packs a day. The toddler, who was taught the habit by his father; lives in Indonesia, and is currently in rehab provided by the Indonesian government. If you haven’t seen the video, it’s above .. that kid is so bad ass. So, being curious; I decided to crunch some numbers. The child at the time of the video was 2 years old; and started to smoke at 18 months. Give or take a few months, the duration of his addiction lasted only about 6 months; but that was enough to get this child addicted — so much so, that he throws a tantrum and gets sick, if he doesn’t get his two packs a day.

Now, every day, he would go through approx. 40 cigarettes. It is estimated that one cigarette takes about 7 minutes of your life away. 7 x 40 is 280 — the boy loses 280 minutes of his life every day. Now, multiply that number by the number of approx. days in 6 months (180 days). 280 x 180 is 50400. There are 1440 minutes in a day. 50400/1440 gives us 35. The boy has lost approx. 35 days of his life.  Now, let’s look at the financial cost to his father.

His father told the news media that it costs him about $5 dollars USD to pay for his son’s fetish.  That means, over 6 months; he spent 900 dollars for his son’s addiction. That money could have bought a lot of ramen.  Now, you know.

I want some noodles now.

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A wild elusive writer appeared. Don’t you just hate it when wild Pokemon attack you when you’re walking in the tall grass?

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This past month, the dusty fields of South Africa have served as the world’s playground and battlefield. Thirty two futbol teams came seeking victory; though, the victor of the competition has yet to be decided.  Like most people, I tuned into a couple of games; however, there was one team that surprised me; it did not win or tie a game, but it just it being at the World Cup raised a few eyebrows.  The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, or in layman’s terms: North Korea.  This team is one shrouded in mystery; other than when they are playing or practicing, they are seldom seen by the press and hardly give press conferences.  

After scoring once against Brazil in a losing effort, the team came under the international spotlight again briefly; for there were rumours of defection. These rumours turned out to be false, when the two players in question, showed up for practice a few days later.  This, however, was not the most bizzare event in the chronicles of the North Korean team.  The coach, Kim Jong-Hun (no relation to the dear leader, we think) told the press that before a game, he gets advice from Kim Jong-il on how to succeed via an invisible phone. Yes, an invisible phone.  According to the coach, the dear leader developed the phone himself.  Unlike, the folks at Apple though, Kim Jong-il has been careful not to leave a prototype at a local cafe (or maybe he did; how would we ever know? The phone is invisible.)

A month before this, state media in North Korea reported that North Korean scientists had discovered a way to harrness the power in nuclear fusion, and then there was the development of this super drink.  In order to understand why, the rogue hermit nation believes in leprechauns and lucky charms; we must dive deeper into the psyche of the North Koreans.  This is a country that worships it’s leader, he is a demi-god; in reality, everything is done for the leader, not the state.  The Korean War led to the manifestation of information by the state; all dissidents were seen as traitors and were thrown in jail.  Transportation was limited; to this day, if you live in a village, you need a visa from the state to travel outside your village.  Anti-American and Japanese images dominate the media, newspapers and the movies that the privileged few get to see.  The brainwashing starts in kindergarten, where children are told stories about how kind and gentle, the Dear Leader was when he was a child.  For example:

One day, high above in the mountains, the dear leader got new boots.  He went outside to play in the snow with his new boots.  But, he saw his comrades wearing wet sneakers, and he became sad.  So, he went back in and came out also wearing wet sneakers.

Sadly, this story (except for the last part) can easily be applied to North Korean life.  While, Kim Jong-il and the party elite, eat whatever they want and drive Benz cars, the rest of the population struggles to survive. The only people who get a decent amount of food are those who are civil servants or those who are in the army (this partially explains why the North Korean army is the 4th largest in the world).

Back to the children, when they are not concentrating on their studies, they, along with the rest of the population,  spend their time practicing for the next large parade for the Dear Leader.  As I said before, the whole country revolves around Kim Jong-il and his late father, Kim Il-sung.  Kim-Il sung is the eternal president of North Korea, and the country dates its years from the time Kim Il-sung was born.  So, 2010 is 98 Juche.  Each room in every building, must have one wall dubbed the ‘portrait wall’.  On this wall, nothing hangs, but two pictures of Kim Jong-il and Kim Il-sung, in their younger years; hanging straight and next to each other.

So, it is not that the North Korean people are ignorant. But rather, the belief in outlandish claims is born out of an effective use of propaganda.

To those who know the subject matter, more than I do, I apologize if I have mischaracterized or misunderstood the country in question.  A bulk of my information was obtained by reading Pyongyang by Guy Delisle; a graphic novel which details his short stay in the country.

Light is a freelance writer and former administrator of LW, who pops in once in a while, when he’s not fishing for Magikarp off the coast of Goldenrod City.  

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Ok so did I ever mention that I am a HUGE Doctor Who fan? (more…)

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